So, remember this guy? Well one day a while ago he did the "speak English because this is America" thing to me and his mom because I was teaching her to say "thank you" and "your welcomed" in Chinese. After that, I decided to name him "白鬼", meaning "white ghost", as sort of a derogatory "white boy" comment.

I was writing an essay and using him as an example so I looked up 白鬼.

It means penis.

I still think it is pretty accurate.

But do I use it in the essay?

Well, I've been trying not to say anything because I don't want to... seem insensitive to the worries of those on my Friends List. It's that time of the year where people are worrying about their grades, and some people are really struggling. I hope everyone is able to recover and get good, if not great, marks.

Here is the problem though--I am worried about my grades, but not because I am worried that I will fail a class and possibly loss parental support or have to leave school. I am concerned that I will get less than a B in Chinese and lose my 3.80 (currently 3.83) GPA and not receive my Summa Cum Laude. I have not done well on the last two tests and I am really scared that I will get a B- or less. =( I know that isn't a earth-shattering concern, but I've worked really, really hard to keep my GPA up there and it's depressing to think that it might fall at the last minute. There isn't much I can do about it at this point, except hope against hope that 1. I get an A+ in my Dao De Jing class, and 2. that my homework and written work make up for the low tests and somehow I pull out a B from that. I'm so worried I feel like breaking down and crying, but I know that won't do me any bit of good. I know I will survive if I don't meet this goal, but I'll be (metaphorically) crushed for a long time. =(

I'm really tired of one-way friendships in which I, or my family, give and give and give without any acknowledgment of our generosity. We go out of our way for people. People include us if it is convenient for them or if we will be useful to them.

You know what, if being friends with people costs so much effort with so little return, maybe it is better if I don't have any friends.

Fuck all of you people who use me and my family.

This is addressed to no one on my Flist, so no worries. =)

Niles couple banned from Wal-Mart after dispute over BIC lighters

RAGE!!!

Happy Halloween everyone!

I love this holiday more than Christmas, Easter, and Forth of July! Hell yes.

Today I am carving pumpkins, going to a small neighborhood party, giving out candy to the neighborhood children, and watching old movies on TMC. What are you people doing?

So I had a dream last night. Roman Polanski was dying of some kind of disease, so they had him on a bed in a garden-like place with trees and such. Women, hundreds of them, were lining up to tell him what they thought of him. I got in line and I told him, "You're a terrible person and The Ninth Gate was a sucked!"

Too bad it was just a dream. =T My words may not have been eloquent, but they were true.

So, as many of you know, I am hoping on going to China next year (around August if everything works out) to teach Chinese at Yantai University. I plan to fill out an application as soon as I have my degree. If I don't get accepted to this program I will slit my wrists I will keep looking until I find something that fits.

The upshot of this is that I will not be working on my websites at all (more than likely) during this long period. My initial idea was that I would, over the course of the summer and school year, revamp all of my sites so that they would be pretty while I am gone for that year. It does not look like that is going to happen.

In the spirit of constructive criticism, I am asking you people which sites you think need the most work. Which sites really need to be overhauled if I have to leave them for two years or more? I want to majorly overhaul at least 3-5 sites. Please make some suggestions if you have time. If there is a site you like to see improved or site that seems outdated, please just tell me. I'll put a list of my sites under a LJ cut to save time. Thank you.

( all of my sites )

So I am going to do the icon meme, but I only have six icons over here, three of which are more than 3 years old, so that would be a little boring. Instead I am going to use my Journalfen icons. Borrowed from trenchkamen
( ICON MEME )

Where has this month gone? Surely it is not September 30th already? Yet it is, isn't it. I can't believe that I have only two and half months left of school before I graduate.

So it has been two weeks since the series finale of Merlin in the US and I am still not pleased.

Let me start out by saying that I really enjoyed the series this summer. I actually made plans around the schedule and looked forward to watching a new episode every week. I was my favorite thing on TV this summer.

Then I watched the last two episodes and I am really disappointed.

( spoilers under the cut for Batman Begins and Merlin Season 1 )

I applied for graduation today. I had not planned to, since I had to go talk to a councilor first and get my Chinese 401 class approved for my major and that meant making an appointment. I did that today and decided that nothing else was stopping me from applying for graduation, so I went ahead and did it. It feels like a huge weight is gone and I can really enjoy the idea of graduation. This is my last semester everyone!!!

JESUS JUMPED JERUSALEM, YO, this is just pathetic. People are actually offended by people who only use their own icons! I'm not kidding. People are AGREEING with this idiotic sentiment.

Icons are not serious business!

8 Chronicles of Narnia Mostly Susan Pevensie
2 Amane Misa from Death Note
10 Ayanami Rei from Neon Genesis Evangelion
10 Kasumi Karen from X/1999
10 Bishoujo Senshi Sailormoon



( I need a big loan from the girl zone )

Oh hell.

So when I applied for financial aid back in February I applied as a part time student. When I received my package, it was significantly less than my previous years, but enough to cover tuition, books, school supplies, and rent, so I was happy.

Friday I got an E-mail saying that my package was changed. I figured it was cut a little bit or maybe a little was added to compensate for the Crisis Fee or whatever. Nope. It was cut in half. They told me a week and a half before school starts that my package was cut in half. OK. I panicked a little then I decided to accept a loan they offered as part of my package but that I didn't accept because I didn't need it. Crisis averted.

Now I looked at my account and they are saying I'm past due on $431.00 because the loan and parts of my package have not come through yet. I went from having RENT money for five months to owing $431.00 and having no money for books or anything in the span of four days!

ASU WHAT THE FUCK!!!

God I hate this school. I can't wait to get the hell out of here. If you need me, I'll be somewhere on the Internet trying to figure out what to do.

Hello. I haven't been around much for the past several days because I've been rather ill. Details are unnecessary and I am doing a lot better. I'll probably be up and moving tomorrow. I finally got to watch all of Death Note so at least it wasn't a huge waste of time.

I have some good news though. Black Dove is Site of the Month over at Deep Submerge! I've never won an honor like that, although Empty Cage did get recommended on arainymonday which was very cool. As soon as I can, I will update the site with this honor. ^^

meme from yeerk

"Using song names from ONE ARTIST, cleverly answer these questions. Pass it on to 11 people. You can't use the band I used. Try not to repeat a song title. It's a lot harder than you think! Repost as 'My Life According To (Band/Artist Name)'"

( My Live According to Tori Amos )

Alexiel.net has a shiny new layout that features Rei and Asuka from Neon Genesis Evangelion. I've also updated PCH and my links page for anyone who is interested. It's only the third layout of this year, but I've been rather busy and uninspired, so there is that.

I'm looking at updating Blue Girl, but I've run into a bit of an issue. I'm really interested in expanding the informational/analysis portion, but generally I prefer tables to frames when it comes to reading stuff. On the other hand, Blue Girl is the only site that I have never used tables on in its nine years of existence. I feel a little sentimental about that fact. I don't know. Here is the layout idea I had, but I'm thinking maybe I should just make something without frames. Thoughts?

So a family I often babysit for asked me to babysit for them some time tomorrow, but the person did not say what time. She, who is the grandmother, not the mother of the children who is out of town, said that she would call me with the exact details. This was two weeks ago. I do not have her number so I have no way of contacting her, short of showing up at the house. Tomorrow is the last day of our pass at the pool and my mom wants to go in the morning and stay as late as we can. Also, my step-dad wants to go out and eat around 7:00 PM at his favorite restaurant (which I will gladly skip since it is a Mexican place). It is 9:30 on a Friday night and the lady still has not called. I could really use the work, for reasons I will get into later, but I'm really pissed off right now. I do have a life. (Stop giggling. Seriously...) I can't sit around waiting for her to call to tell me A. what time she needs me, B. whether she needs me at all. I know she may be busy, but so am I. A lot of the families I babysit do shit like this. They either make unspecific plans or they don't call me until a few hours before they need me. It helps pay the bills, but I am getting to the point where I may just need to get a regular job and tell these people to find someone else to be their bitch. =(

edit: I got the job. She called while I was at the pool, but we got back in time. I made $45 so I no longer feel the need to complain. =)

A Beautiful Mind is my single page site dedicated to Abby Sciuto of NCIS. It's not really done because I plan to expand it into a full site in the future, but I initially planned for it to only be a one-pager so I will simply add on to it as I go until the one-page marathon is over. Abby is currently my favorite character on live-action TV, plus she is a female character that I think represents a strong, but non-violent woman, so there is that aspect as well. I know the layout is a little plain, but I wanted to do something "less is more", plus I wanted to make it as readable as humanly possible. I think I achieved that end at least. ^^

I'm not crazy about the title, but I wanted to do something the emphasized her brilliance as a scientist, rather than her identity as a Goth. I think if she was in another show, like a sitcom, where she wasn't brilliant as well as silly, I would not like her as much. She's a cool scientist, and that is what I like about her. I know she isn't particularly realistic, but I think she is fun and interesting.

15 Chronicles of Narnia
15 Shoujo Kakumei Utena


( I can be cruel, I don't know why )